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Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder or ADHD is a very common condition affecting individuals and children from even very young ages. In fact, about 6.1 million children in the United States have been diagnosed with ADHD in 2016 (Danielson et al., 2018). Children with ADHD struggle with a lot of things beyond just paying attention, such as low self-esteem and communication problems, social skills, and behavioral regulation, among many others.
ADHD and Lying
ADHD can look very different from individual to individual and therefore there are different presentations of ADHD, reflecting inattentive, hyperactive-impulsive, or a combination of both behaviors. Regardless of the type, there's only one thing certain about this condition. It affects your child's or teen's personality, academic performance, and social functions. Your child may be a creative kid, but he may show a symptom of ADHD that could lead to more significant behavioral or emotional issues that persist into adulthood.ADHD and lying behavior can be common. Children with ADHD may have impulse issues that result in misbehavior, particularly lying. Lying is never a good trait, and many parents find it irritating when they learn that their child is lying. They are often perplexed by the behavior and really just don't get why it is happening and why do kids with ADHD lie often.What's more frustrating is that the child's tendency to lie gets worse as parents try to admonish them. The more they point it out and try to help their child or teen, the bigger the whole their kid digs. When confronted, kids can be angry and emotional and that leads to even greater conflict. This is the struggle that the parents of children with ADHD face.
Hillary's Story
Hillary was a teen with a long history of lying, ADHD, and anxiety. When she was a child, Hillary began to lie to avoid “getting in trouble” then over time she began to lie about everyday things that left her parents confused and frustrated. It's a typical scenario of ADHD and lying. Then it shifted to lying about food and hiding food in her room. They tried therapy and meds with no real change in Hillary's behaviors. It all came to a head after Hillary was busted for lying about not going to classes in college when in fact she went off to college and never went to one class!By the time the family came to our our program, things were really broken down. After some intensive work, we got to the core of why Hillary was lying, shame. She had a deep shame about her struggles and when the lying started, she just didn't know how to stop. With a regulated and calm brain from neurofeedback and PEMF coupled with family therapy, Hillary was able to stop her subconscious lying habit.
Is Lying Normal Among Children with ADHD?
Whether your child has ADHD or not, making little white lies is a stage that they go through. It's actually normal for children to lie because, at a very young age, they don't know the difference between fantasy and reality just yet. However, when the child gets older, they get a clearer picture of the truth and start to understand that it is wrong to tell a lie.But then, things are different for children with ADHD. Because of their impulsive behavior, they may blurt out a lie more frequently than neurotypical children. They do this not with the intention of deceiving but because they have issues with their executive functions.Kids with ADHD lie to avoid punishment, blame, and feelings of shame. Kids with ADHD can have extreme sensitivity to criticism and a variety of behaviors can result including lying, anger and emotional outbursts. Having one's behavior constantly criticized is going to of course cause a child or teen to feel bad about themselves. ADHD doesn't just affect school but rather all aspects of one's life.In extreme forms, a person with ADHD who is very sensitive to perceived or real criticism can have a comorbid condition called rejection-sensitive dysphoria (RSD). This is a condition that affects a large percentage of those with ADHD (upwards of 70 percent) and overlaps with ADHD symptoms. Children and teens with RSD are prone to emotional dysregulation when they feel criticized or rejected. They display strong emotional reactions that can disrupt a child's and their family's life and adults too, as it often leads to friction and upset with others.So, if you have a and they lie, most of the time, they didn't do it on purpose. While there might not be a good reason why they lied, the imperfections in the different parts of their brain prevented them from acting normally. They may be stuck in a subconscious behavioral habit that is rooted in anxiety, shame, or fear of criticism or rejection.Even so, their problem with lying has to be addressed accordingly. To do so, you may solicit the help of a school psychologist or private therapist if possible. The lying instances of your child may seem to be little things now. But if left ignored, they may turn into more serious behaviors, including at-risk behaviors such as substance abuse or even criminal activity later. Moreover, they may mask more serious clinical issues such as anxiety, OCD, or depression.Getting to the root cause of the lying, but also creating a safe place where they can express themselves and assess their behavior is important too. Don't personalize the behavior and instead think of lying as just another behavior that your child or teen is capable of unlearning.
Lying For Attention?
Parents often question if the child is lying for attention or if there is something else going on. Constant arguing may have children even asking themselves, “Why am I lying for attention?”
The reality is most ADHD kids lie to avoid punishment, shame or embarrassment. Parents can feel like kids are being disrespectful when really they don't know what else to do. It is important to not personalize the behavior and focus on teaching kids strategies.
You can get her books for parents and professionals, including: It’s Gonna Be OK™: Proven Ways to Improve Your Child’s Mental Health, Teletherapy Toolkit™ and Brain Under Attack: A Resource For Parents and Caregivers of Children With PANS, PANDAS, and Autoimmune Encephalopathy.If you are a business or organization that needs proactive guidance to support employee mental health or an organization looking for a brand representative, check out Dr. Roseann’s media page and professional speaking page to see how we can work together.Dr. Roseann is a Children’s Mental Health Expert and Licensed Therapist who has been featured in/on hundreds of media outlets including The Mel Robbins Show, CBS, NBC, PIX11 NYC, Today, FORBES, CNN, The New York Times, The Washington Post, Business Insider,Women’s Day, Healthline, CNET,Parade Magazine and PARENTS. FORBES called her, “A thought leader in children’s mental health.”
She coined the terms, “Re-entry panic syndrome” and “eco-anxiety” and is a frequent contributor to media on mental health.Dr. Roseann Capanna-Hodge has three decades of experience in working with children, teens and their families with attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), autism, concussion, dyslexia and learning disability, anxiety, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), depression and mood disorder, Lyme Disease, and PANS/PANDAS using science-backed natural mental health solutions such as supplements, magnesium, nutrition, QEEG Brain maps, neurofeedback, PEMF, psychotherapy and other non-medication approaches.She is the author of three bestselling books, It’s Gonna Be OK!: Proven Ways to Improve Your Child's Mental Health, The Teletherapy Toolkit, and Brain Under Attack. Dr. Roseann is known for offering a message of hope through science-endorsed methods that promote a calm brain.Her trademarked our science-backed approachⓇ Program and It’s Gonna be OK!Ⓡ Podcast has been a cornerstone for thousands of parents facing mental health, behavioral or neurodevelopmental challenges.She is the founder and director of The Global Institute of Children’s Mental Health, Neurotastic™Brain Formulas and Dr. Roseann Capanna-Hodge, LLC. Dr. Roseann is a Board Certified Neurofeedback (BCN) Practitioner, a Board Member of the Northeast Region Biofeedback Society (NRBS), Certified Integrative Mental Health Professional (CIMHP) and an Amen Clinic Certified Brain Health Coach. She is also a member of The International Lyme Disease and Associated Disease Society (ILADS), The American Psychological Association (APA), Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA) National Association of School Psychologists (NASP), International OCD Foundation (IOCDF).© Roseann-Capanna-Hodge, LLC 2024Disclaimer: This article is not intended to give health advice and it is recommended to consult with a physician before beginning any new wellness regime. *The effectiveness of diagnosis and treatment vary by patient and condition. Dr. Roseann Capanna-Hodge, LLC does not guarantee certain results.
