9 Mindful Parenting Tips: Simple Strategies to Improve Attention, Calm and Connectedness

Parenting today can feel overwhelming with endless to-do lists and constant digital distractions. It’s easy to get caught up in the hustle and forget to connect with the ones who matter most: your kids. Mindful parenting might sound like a fancy term, but it's really about being present and connected in your daily interactions.

You can't be a perfect parent all the time, but creating an environment of calm and connectedness will significantly benefit your child's development. If you're looking for practical, mindful parenting tips, you're in the right place. Let’s explore some simple, effective strategies to make mindful parenting a natural part of your routine.

What is Mindfulness?

Mindfulness is the practice of being fully present and engaged in the current moment without judgment. It involves paying attention to what’s happening around you and within you—your thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations. The goal is to observe these experiences with awareness and acceptance rather than reacting to them impulsively. The practice of various mindfulness-based strategies will naturally settle the nervous system and create a sense of relaxation and calm. By applying these principles to parenting, we can learn to be more connected parents, which translates to a happier home life.

Practicing mindfulness can help reduce stress, improve emotional regulation, and enhance overall mental health and well-being by fostering a deeper connection with yourself and others.

Key Aspects of Mindfulness:

1. Awareness: Noticing what is happening in the present moment, including your surroundings, thoughts, and feelings.
   
   
2. Non-Judgment: Observing your experiences without labeling them as good or bad. This means accepting things as they are without trying to change them.
   
   
3. Focus: Paying attention to the present time rather than being distracted by past events or future worries.
   
   
4. Acceptance: Embracing your experiences and feelings without trying to suppress or deny them.

How to Practice Mindful Parenting

Start by setting aside distractions—put away your phone and focus on your child during conversations or activities. Make time for regular mindfulness practices, such as deep breathing or mindful listening, to help you stay calm and centered. Pay attention to your own triggers and respond with empathy, rather than reacting impulsively.

Model kindness and emotional awareness for your children, and encourage open communication about feelings. By being mindful of your interactions and your own emotions, you’ll foster a more connected and supportive family environment.

Mindful parenting is a parenting style focused on connecting yourself to the people around you both physically and emotionally. Physically, it means focusing your body on the people around you. Emotionally, it requires you to manage your feelings so that you can help your children manage theirs.  

Practicing mindful parenting reinforces positive parenting. Here are more tips for you:

9 Mindful Parenting Tips for Positive Parenting

1. Be in the Present Moment

That means unplugging from technology and not multitasking. To connect, you have to be present. That happens through meaningful engagements. While this may be your biggest hurdle in mindful parenting, it is the most important one. Being in the present moment involves consciously shifting your focus away from past regrets or future worries and immersing yourself in what's happening right now.

Here are some practical steps to help you stay present:

Focus on Your Senses

Pay attention to what you can see, hear, smell, taste, and touch. Engaging your senses can ground you in the present and make you more aware of your surroundings.

Practice Deep Breathing

Take slow, deep breaths to calm your mind and bring your attention back to the present. Focus on the sensation of your deep breath, moving in and out.

Engage Fully in Activities

When you’re doing something, whether it’s eating, talking, or working, give it your full attention. Avoid multitasking, as it can pull you away from the moment.

Observe Your Thoughts

Notice your thoughts without judging them. Acknowledge them, but gently bring your focus back to what you’re doing right now.

Use Mindfulness Cues

Set reminders or cues throughout your day to pause and check in with yourself. It could be as simple as a sticky note on your desk or a phone alert.

Practice Gratitude

Reflect on what you’re grateful for in the present moment. This can help shift your focus from what’s lacking to what’s currently fulfilling.

By using mindfulness techniques and incorporating these practices into your daily routine, you can enhance your ability to stay present and fully engage with your experiences.

2. Mindfulness to Ease Parental Stress

Practice makes perfect, so having a designated mindfulness time helps to reinforce the habit. Pick a time of day and stick to it. Devote at least 10 minutes to mindfulness breathing or conversation. When we give our brain and body regular practice at being calm, our Central Nervous System (CNS) is more likely to follow that rhythm. And at a minimum, when our CNS is less taxed, we can handle stress better.

Bögels et al. (2014) found that mindful parenting practices can significantly reduce parental stress and improve mental health outcomes for both parents and children. Their research highlights how incorporating mindfulness into parenting can positively affect various aspects of family life, including parenting skills, co-parenting, and overall family dynamics.

One of the key mindful parenting benefits is its ability to alleviate stressful situations, fostering a sense of calm and enhancing overall family well-being. Here are some activities to consider:

Breathing

Take a few minutes each day to practice deep, slow breathing. Sit comfortably, close your eyes, and focus on the sensation of your breath as it moves in and out. This can help you stay calm and centered.

Active Listening

When interacting with your child, practice active listening. Put away distractions, make eye contact, and fully engage in what your child is saying. This helps build a stronger connection and shows that you value their thoughts and feelings.

Gratitude Journaling

Spend a few minutes each day writing down everyday blessings for which you’re grateful. You and your child can practice mindfulness through the simple act of journalling. This practice can help improve attention and focus on the positive aspects of your life and enhance your overall sense of well-being.

Walking

Take a leisurely walk outside and pay attention to the sights, sounds, and sensations around you. Use this time to clear your mind and enjoy the present moment.

Mindful Eating

Focus on the experience of eating by savoring each bite, noticing the flavors, and chewing slowly. This can make mealtimes more enjoyable and help you appreciate your food.

Playtime

Engage in activities with your child that encourage full presence, such as playing a board game, doing crafts, or simply having a conversation. The goal is to be fully engaged and attentive during these moments.

Reflection

Set aside time to reflect on your day. Consider what went well, what challenges you faced, and how you felt throughout. This can help you process your experiences and plan for improvements.

Guided Meditations

Use apps or online resources for guided meditations specifically designed for parents. These can provide relaxation and stress relief, making it easier to manage daily challenges.

Mindful Parenting Workshops

Many parents who want to dive deep into mindfulness practice participate in workshops or online courses focused on mindful parenting techniques. These can provide new strategies and support for integrating mindfulness into your parenting routine.

Incorporating these activities into your daily routine can help you stay present, reduce stress, and build a stronger, more connected relationship with your child.

3. Regulate Mind-Body Connections

By teaching children to connect with the breath, they learn how to notice what their body is telling them. We are always rushing, and anxiety has become an accepted norm. When you make mind-body connections, children learn how to self-regulate more readily. This can be part of your self-care routine. That ability to self-soothe and manage their own stress and be calm when feeling overwhelmed, is an invaluable tool that helps them today and tomorrow.

4. Practice Active Listening 

When your children talk to you, put down your phone and make eye contact. Be engaged. Our children know when we are really listening. Children love to chatter and tell stories, and we need to be present and listen to them. These moments create long-lasting connections for both young children and teens. Find the time that they are most likely to talk and be present. Recognize that sometimes our children or teens don’t want advice, they just want to be heard.

Duncan et al. (2009) describe mindful parenting as an approach that emphasizes the importance of being present and attentive in parent-child interactions. This model suggests that mindful parenting can enhance the quality of these interactions by fostering greater emotional awareness, empathy, and responsiveness, ultimately benefiting both parent and child relationships.

5. Acknowledge your Own Feelings and Model Kindness

Practice what you preach. Mindful and compassionate parenting helps keep our children are calmer. One of the easiest ways to be a mindful parent is to model kindness and empathy. Mindfulness exercises for parents come in a variety of forms. For example, volunteering at the soup kitchen shows your children social compassion, but what you do at home is just as important. It is those little moments of forgiveness, kind language, and humor that all add in the life of a child. Not only should we model kindness and empathy, but we should reinforce it when we see it in the behavior of our children and teens. These little moments make a huge difference in a child's behavior and character development.

6. Use Emotional Language

Families that communicate about feelings have healthier communication and lower stress levels. When we disconnect, we find it more difficult to feel what we are experiencing. Emotional disconnection often results in uncomfortable feelings such as being unfocused, feeling stressed, or anxious. I recently had a dad tell me how mad he was at his young child for expressing that she didn’t want to make her bed. The father stripped the bed and said in anger and frustration, “Now you have a reason not to like making your bed.” In the dad’s mind, he thought this child had no reason to complain because this was a task she should do.  

The mindful parenting approach would have been taking a moment and trying to connect with the child about why making her bed feels hard and process it out while working toward a resolution. When we practice mindful parenting, both child and parent walked away feeling angry and confused, with each remaining perplexed about the underlying issue. Mindful parenting isn’t the short-cut to parenting, rather, it is a way to improve parenting over time and improve emotional connections and language.

7. Identify your Emotional Triggers

Mindful parenting activities also include noticing your feelings when you're in an emotional state or conflict with your child. Ask yourself:

• Is this my own stuff?
• Is this from familial patterns of parenting?
• What part did I have in this conflict or situation?

Think about your most recent frustrating situation with your child or argument with your teen. Ask yourself:

• What emotions were triggered?
• Are you angry, irritated, or embarrassed?
• What did it feel like for you in your body?
• Can you be mindful of that feeling and try to learn to calm that on your own?

Rather than blaming yourself, think about the situation through your child’s or teen’s eyes and try to feel connected to them. When your child shows big emotions, try to respond with kindness, empathy, and emotional language. Make an effort throughout the day to notice in your body where you are holding stress. Think about what makes you feel anxious or annoyed to find emotional triggers. Once you figure out your triggers, you can break that cycle and implement strategies to reduce uncomfortable feelings and stress.

8. Model Stress Management

Our children learn from watching us, including how to handle stress. We set the tone for not only how our kids manage stress today but also how they manage it in their lives. While that may feel overwhelming, a lot of positivism lives in that since we can empower our children to learn healthy ways to manage stress. Be mindful of negative self-talk and limiting beliefs, since children pick up this negative talk, which can become an Achilles heel for their whole lives. Today’s children have a very low tolerance for stress, and we need to reinforce that stressful things happen to everyone, and this is how I manage it. Giving them those tools, such as mindful techniques and coping skills is a fantastic gift.

9. Be Mindful of Discipline

No good parent enjoys disciplining their child.  However, even the most self-regulated kids need discipline and boundaries once in a while, and some children need a lot of behavioral support. Being a mindful parent means making conscious decisions and not just following the same parenting patterns you learned from your parents. Even when disciplining your child, it's important to create a supportive and safe environment. This approach helps maintain trust and fosters a positive parent-child relationship, even during challenging moments.

If you view discipline as teaching consequences rather than punishing behaviors, then you understand it is an opportunity to teach your children skills. When helping your child learn through discipline, it is important to:

• Connect in a mindful, non-confrontational way. That means waiting until the battle is over and you both are calm. Learning isn’t going to occur when things are heated, and the situation can even escalate. Mindful parenting is a process, and we want to break this kind of non-productive situation.
  
  
• Use emotional language. “I see that you are sad and let’s figure out why?” When you connect to emotions, you reduce stress and improve healthy communication.
  
  
• Validate what they are feeling. “I understand that you want to go to that party, and you are feeling upset about it.” Everyone wants to feel heard and validating feelings is so important in improving communication and protecting feelings.
  
  
• Listen. Be mindful of what they are saying and listen. Don’t interrupt. Just because you are listening doesn’t mean you agree or are “giving in” rather it is teaching them to hear people out, and that communication involves both speaking and listening.
  
  
• Reflection. The process of active communication involves reflecting on what the person has said. As a psychologist, I can tell you that in therapy, most kids don’t feel heard by their parents, and the process of reflection is a way to mediate that.
  

Resolution. Work on a resolution after both parties are heard. The solution can be one that works for both of you. “You can do x after you do x.”

Reactive Parenting vs. Mindful Parenting

Reactive parenting often involves responding to situations with immediate, emotion-driven reactions, which can sometimes escalate conflicts and create distance. In contrast, mindful parenting emphasizes staying calm, empathetic, and present, fostering a more connected and understanding relationship with your child.

Parenting isn’t easy, and learning how to be a mindful parent is a process that pays off both today and tomorrow. Giving your child the gifts of connectedness, self-compassion, empathy, and self-regulation is so important in today’s hurried, overwhelmed, and stressed world.