Executive Thinking Skills: Five Key Parenting Strategies

Executive Thinking Skills Five Key Parenting Strategies (1)
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Dr. Roseann Capanna-Hodge

Imagine this scene: Your middle schooler is slumped at the kitchen table, staring at their homework like it's written in some alien language. Sound familiar? We've all been there, caught in the never-ending cycle of “I'll start in five minutes,” constant distractions, and eventual meltdowns. It's not just about a lack of motivation—there's something deeper at play here: a lack of executive functioning skills.

In my Ridgefield, CT center, many moms come to me frustrated because their kids can't complete their homework and are struggling with failing grades because they lack executive function. If this is the case, you need to become a parent detective and investigate any underlying issues.

Executive dysfunction can be a sign of underlying mental health conditions such as ADHD, ASD, traumatic brain injury/ brain damage, OCD, mood disorders, or learning disabilities. My expertise is in understanding brain function and calming the brain, and executive function is a set of skills that are controlled by the frontal lobe of the brain.

Let's break down how this executive function struggle impacts day to day life and, more importantly, how to turn that mess of a school day into a success.

Understanding Executive Function

Executive function refers to mental processes that help you set and carry out and achieve goals well, solve problems, make plans, and manage emotions. Executive function is a set of various cognitive skills and processes that enable individuals to manage themselves and their resources in order to carry out and complete a task. These mental skills help with planning, focusing attention, remembering instructions, and juggling multiple things effectively.

If you're a worried parent struggling to get your child to focus and complete tasks, the Executive Functioning Parent Toolkit is designed just for you. This toolkit offers practical, science-backed strategies to help you understand and address your child's attention and executive functioning challenges. 

By using evidence-based techniques, you can stop the cycle of constant nagging and frustration. You'll learn how to effectively manage behaviors, improve your child's focus, and foster independence, all while reducing stress for both you and your child. With this toolkit, you can transform your parenting approach and see meaningful changes in just 30 days, turning your daily struggles into a more manageable and positive experience.

7 Components of Executive Function

1. Planning and Organization

The ability to create a roadmap to reach a goal or complete a task, including setting priorities and managing time.

2. Working Memory

The capacity to hold and manipulate information in mind over short periods.

3. Cognitive Flexibility

Cognitive flexibility is the ability to adapt thinking and behavior in response to changing circumstances or new information. This skill relies heavily on the prefrontal cortex, which plays a crucial role in managing and adjusting our cognitive processes to navigate diverse situations effectively.

4. Impulse Control and Inhibitory Control

Inhibitory control is a key component of executive function that involves the ability to regulate one's impulses and resist distractions or temptations. Inhibition control allows individuals to suppress automatic or dominant responses and choose more appropriate, goal-oriented actions instead.

5. Self-Monitoring

The ability to evaluate one's own performance and make adjustments as needed.

6. Problem-Solving

The ability to identify problems, generate possible solutions and implement effective strategies.

7. Emotional Regulation

The ability to manage and respond to emotional experiences in a controlled manner.

Understanding Executive Functions and Metacognition

Metacognition is the awareness and understanding of one's own brain and thought processes, essentially “thinking about thinking.” It involves the ability to monitor, control, and plan one's activities. By being metacognitive, individuals can understand how they learn, recognize their strengths and weaknesses, and adapt their strategies to improve learning and problem-solving.

Executive function and metacognition are like the dynamic duo of our thinking process, each playing a vital role in how we learn and solve problems. 

Imagine executive functions as the manager who keeps everything running smoothly. This manager helps you plan your day, stay organized, remember important information, switch gears when plans change, and keep your emotions in check. It's an executive function skill that helps you stay focused on your homework, follow through on projects, and manage your time effectively.

Now, think of metacognition as the coach who helps you improve your game. This coach makes you aware of how you think and learn. It involves recognizing your strengths and weaknesses, figuring out what study methods work best for you, and adjusting your approach when something isn’t working. It’s like having an inner voice that says, “Hey, that strategy isn’t working. Let’s try something different.”

These two work hand-in-hand. For example, when you’re doing a big project, your executive function helps you break it down into manageable steps and keeps you on track. Meanwhile, cognitive flexibility and metacognition helps you check in with yourself, asking, “Is this method effective? Do I need to adjust my approach?” Together, they help you not only get things done but to accomplish tasks and improve how you do them.

Executive function is about managing tasks and staying organized, while self control and metacognition is about being aware of and improving your own thinking and learning processes. When they work together, they help you tackle challenges more effectively and become a more efficient learner and problem solver.

Key Signs of Executive Function Disorder

Key Signs of Executive Function Disorder

A lack of executive functioning skills can lead to various challenges and difficulties in daily life, affecting personal, academic, and professional areas. Here’s a breakdown of the potential results of executive dysfunction:

Difficulty with Organization
People may struggle to keep track of things to do, manage time effectively, and maintain order in their environment. This can lead to missed due dates, and a generally disorganized life.

Poor Time Management
Without strong executive functioning skills, individuals might find it hard to prioritize tasks, estimate how long tasks will take, and stick to schedules. This can result in procrastination and last-minute rushes.

Challenges with Planning
Creating and following through on plans can be difficult. This might manifest as trouble setting goals, breaking tasks into manageable steps, and anticipating potential obstacles.

Impulsivity and Poor Self-Control
Individuals might struggle with their inhibition control, lack of emotional control, and resisting distractions. This can lead to impulsive decisions, difficulty staying focused on certain task, and frequent interruptions in work or daily activities.

Difficulty with Problem-Solving
A lack of executive function can affect one’s ability to identify problems, generate solutions, and implement strategies. This can make it challenging to navigate complex tasks or adapt to changing circumstances.

Struggles with Working Memory
People who struggle with executive function may have trouble holding and manipulating information in their mind. This can affect their brain's ability to follow multi-step instructions, remember details, focus and stay on track during tasks.

Emotional Regulation Issues
Managing emotions and coping with stress can make everyday tasks to be more difficult, leading to heightened frustration, anxiety, or mood swings, which can further impact daily executive functioning and relationships.

Academic and Professional Challenges
In school, these difficulties can translate into lower performance, missing a due date, and trouble with completing tasks or social skills or collaborating with others.

All of these signs and executive dysfunction symptoms can vary from one person to another. To help you better understand what this behavior might look like in early childhood, here are some examples:

  • Messy backpack 
  • Disorganized locker 
  • Crumpled papers
  • Unorganized books 
  • Missing assignments 
  • Rushed assignments 
  • Trouble finding things 
  • Incomplete homework, assignments
  • Forgotten deadlines 
  • Incomplete/disorganized class notes 
  • Ill-prepared for presentations or class activities 
  • Frequent procrastinating 
  • Doing homework at the last minute 
  • Lost or misplaced belongings 
  • Lack of or inconsistent study habits 
  • Trouble following directions
  • Cannot manage time
  • Missed due dates
  • Panics when rules or routines change
  • Cannot switch tasks
  • Easily distracted
  • Cannot pay attention in class
  • Failing grades

Five Key Parenting Strategies to Help Your Child With Executive Dysfunction

5 key Parenting Strategies to Help with Executive Dysfunction

1. Building Working Memory

Working memory involves a child’s ability to retain and store learned information and then later put it to use. These everyday skills are crucial to a child’s success in the classroom, as it is responsible for short-term memory and execution.

A strong working memory is exhibited by a child who successfully remembers and executes instructions.

Here are a few things you can do as a parent to help build working memory:

  • Play Memory Games: Engage your child's executive functioning skills in memory games like “Simon Says,” “Memory Match,” or “I Spy,” where they have to recall and follow sequences or find matching pairs. Play is a powerful way to enhance learning and brain development (Gibbs et. al, 2021).

     

  • Use Visual Aids: Create visual schedules or charts to help your child remember daily routines or tasks. Use color-coding or pictures to make it more engaging.

     

  • Practice Repetition: Encourage your child to repeat information, such as phone numbers, addresses, or important facts, to help reinforce their memory.

     

  • Teach Mnemonic Devices: Introduce simple mnemonic devices or memory tricks, such as acronyms or rhymes, to help them remember lists or concept.

     

  • Encourage Storytelling: Ask your child to tell you a story or describe their day in detail. This helps them practice organizing and recalling information.

     

  • Create Memory Maps: Use graphic organizers or mind maps to help your child visually organize and recall information for school projects or studying.

2. Developing Adaptable Thinking

Adaptable thinking gives a child the ability to problem solve or adjust to situations when necessary. This skill also applies to a child’s ability to see things from someone else’s perspective. A child in old age who exhibits adaptable thinking isn’t stumped by everyday life hurdles or a difference in opinion.

Here are some practical examples for parents to encourage adaptable and flexible thinking:

  • Introduce New Experiences: Encourage your child to try new activities, hobbies, or foods. Exposure to new experiences helps them learn to adapt to unfamiliar situations and overcome initial resistance.

     

  • Play Problem-Solving Games: Engage in games and activities that require flexible thinking, such as puzzles, strategy games, or role-playing scenarios where they have to adapt their approach based on changing rules or outcomes.
  • Encourage Open-Ended Play: Provide opportunities for unstructured play where your child can use their imagination and adapt their play scenarios as they go. This helps them practice thinking creatively and flexibly.

     

  • Discuss Different Perspectives: When discussing issues or problems, encourage your child to consider multiple viewpoints. Ask them how different people might feel or react differently in various situations.

     

  • Use “What If” Scenarios: Pose “what if” questions to your child that require them to think about how they would respond to different hypothetical situations. For example, “What if it rains on the day of our picnic? What could we do instead?”

     

  • Practice Role-Playing: Role-play different social situations where your child needs to adapt their behavior or responses. This can help them learn how to handle real-life changes and challenges more effectively.

3. Effective Time Management and Organization

Time management concerns a child’s ability to properly organize a schedule and complete tasks on time. Time management is imperative for a child in an array of scenarios as it facilitates productivity, punctuality, and goal setting skills.

Good time management is essential for completing multi-step projects before deadlines.

Here are some parent strategies to improve your child's executive function and time management skills and organization skills:

  • Create a Visual Schedule: Use a calendar or chart to map out daily routines, including school, homework, chores, and extracurricular activities. This helps your child see what to expect and plan their time effectively. This is also can help in establishing routines.

     

  • Set Up a Homework Station: Designate a specific area for homework that is organized and free from distractions. Ensure that all necessary supplies are readily available to help your child stay focused and organized.

     

  • Use Timers and Alarms: Teach your child to use timers or alarms to allocate time for specific tasks. For example, they can use a timer to manage study sessions, breaks, and transition times between activities.

     

  • Teach Prioritization: Help your child prioritize their tasks by identifying what needs to be done first and what can wait. Use a to-do list to organize tasks based on their importance and deadlines.

     

  • Use Organizational Tools: Introduce your child to tools like planners, notebooks, or digital apps to keep track of assignments, deadlines, and appointments. Teach them how to use these tools effectively to stay organized.

     

  • Encourage Regular Clean-Ups: Set aside time each day or week for your child to clean and organize their personal space, such as their room or backpack. This helps them develop habits for maintaining order and finding things easily.

4. Leveraging Technology to Support Executive Function

Technology can be a powerful tool to support executive function development, including apps, extensions, and software. Tools can help with organization, time management, and working memory development.

Examples of technology that can support executive functions:

  • Digital Calendars and Reminders: Use apps like Google Calendar or Apple Calendar to set up schedules and reminders for tasks, deadlines, and appointments. These tools help your child keep track of their commitments.

     

  • Task Management Apps: Apps like Todoist, Microsoft To Do, or Wunderlist can help your child create and manage to-do lists. They can set priorities, deadlines, and track their progress on various tasks and assignments.

     

  • Note-Taking Apps: Encourage the use of apps like Evernote, OneNote, or Notion for organizing notes, ideas, and important information. These apps can help your child keep their study materials and assignments organized.

     

  • Study Aids and Flashcards: Tools like Quizlet or Anki can be used to create digital flashcards for studying. These apps often include features like spaced repetition to enhance memory retention.

     

  • Time Management Apps: Apps such as Focus Booster or Forest can help your child manage their time effectively. These apps use techniques like the Pomodoro Technique or create a distraction-free environment to improve focus and productivity.

     

  • Visual Schedules: Use apps like Visual Schedule Planner or Choiceworks to create visual schedules and routines. These tools help children with visual cues for daily activities, improving their ability to follow routines.

     

  • Mind Mapping Tools: Apps like MindMeister or XMind can be used to create visual mind maps for brainstorming, organizing thoughts, and planning projects. This helps children see connections and structure their ideas.

     

  • Reminder Apps: Apps like Alarmed or Due can be used to set reminders for tasks, breaks, and important deadlines. These apps ensure that your child doesn’t forget key responsibilities.

5. Creating a Supportive Environment

Creating a supportive environment can help individuals with executive function skills continue to challenges. A supportive environment can help individuals build confidence and continue to develop executive function skills.

Here are some examples of how you can foster such an environment:

  • Designate a Study Area: Set up a quiet, organized, and distraction-free space for your child to complete their homework and study. Ensure the area has all necessary supplies and is comfortable for focused work.

     

  • Establish Routines: Develop consistent daily routines for activities like waking up, mealtimes, homework, and bedtime. Routines help children understand what to expect and build structure into their day.

     

  • Break Big Tasks into Steps: When giving instructions, give one task at a time and break it down into smaller tasks, manageable steps. Ask your child to repeat the steps back to you to reinforce their memory.

     

  • Provide Organizational Tools: Equip your child with tools such as planners, folders, and storage bins to help them organize their school materials, assignments, and personal items. Help your child create checklists for their daily tasks and responsibilities. Teach them how to plan ahead.

     

  • Promote Open Communication: Maintain open lines of communication with your child about their tasks, challenges, and feelings. Being available to listen and offer guidance helps them feel supported and understood. During these challenges, parents are a big part of how a child's executive function skills can improve as you teach them new behaviors.

     

  • Encourage Flexibility: Teach your child to be flexible by handling unexpected changes or challenges calmly. Practice adapting to new plans or solving problems together to build their adaptability.

     

  • Offer Support with Homework: Be available to help with homework without doing it for them. Provide guidance and encouragement, and help them break down complex tasks into manageable steps. Building reliable relationships with your child can help them gain confidence and complete tasks in school.

     

  • Promote Healthy Habits: Ensure your child gets enough sleep, eats a balanced diet, and engages in regular physical activity. Good health supports cognitive functioning and overall well-being.

Creating a supportive environment at home ensures that your child’s executive functioning skills develop effectively over time. Modeling social behavior as a parent can also help your child build main skills that can help executive functioning skills.

Citations: 

Gibb, R., Coelho, L., Van Rootselaar, N. A., Halliwell, C., MacKinnon, M., Plomp, I., & Gonzalez, C. L. R. (2021). Promoting Executive Function Skills in Preschoolers Using a Play-Based Program. Frontiers in psychology, 12, 720225. https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2021.720225 

Dr. Roseann is a mental health expert in Executive Functioning who frequently is in the media:

  • Cheddar News Ask A Therapist: Student Mental Health And The Return To School
  • Broglie Box   A School Psychologist’s Advice For Students On How To Cope During This ‘New Normal’
  • Think Inclusive  How Families Can Support Twice Exceptional Children

Are you looking for SOLUTIONS for your struggling child or teen? 

Dr. Roseann and her team are all about science-backed solutions, so you are in the right place! 

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Dr. Roseann is a Children’s Mental Health Expert and Licensed Therapist who has been featured in/on hundreds of media outlets including The Mel Robbins Show, CBS, NBC, PIX11 NYC, Today, FORBES, CNN, The New York Times, The Washington Post, Business Insider, Women’s Day, Healthline, CNET, Parade Magazine and PARENTS. FORBES called her, “A thought leader in children’s mental health.

Dr. Roseann - Brain Behavior Reset Parent Toolkit

She coined the terms, “Re-entry panic syndrome” and “eco-anxiety” and is a frequent contributor to media on mental health. 

Dr. Roseann Capanna-Hodge has three decades of experience in working with children, teens and their families with attention-deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), autism, concussion, dyslexia and learning disability, anxiety, Obsessive Compulsive Disorder (OCD), depression and mood disorder, Lyme Disease, and PANS/PANDAS using science-backed natural mental health solutions such as supplements, magnesium, nutrition, QEEG Brain maps, neurofeedback, PEMF, psychotherapy and other non-medication approaches. 

She is the author of three bestselling books, It’s Gonna Be OK!: Proven Ways to Improve Your Child's Mental Health, The Teletherapy Toolkit, and Brain Under Attack. Dr. Roseann is known for offering a message of hope through science-endorsed methods that promote a calm brain. 

Her trademarked BrainBehaviorResetⓇ Program and It’s Gonna be OK!Ⓡ Podcast has been a cornerstone for thousands of parents facing mental health, behavioral or neurodevelopmental challenges.

She is the founder and director of The Global Institute of Children’s Mental Health, Neurotastic™Brain Formulas and Dr. Roseann Capanna-Hodge, LLC. Dr. Roseann is a Board Certified Neurofeedback (BCN) Practitioner, a Board Member of the Northeast Region Biofeedback Society (NRBS), Certified Integrative Mental Health Professional (CIMHP) and an Amen Clinic Certified Brain Health Coach.  She is also a member of The International Lyme Disease and Associated Disease Society (ILADS), The American Psychological Association (APA), Anxiety and Depression Association of America (ADAA) National Association of School Psychologists (NASP), International OCD Foundation (IOCDF).

© Roseann-Capanna-Hodge, LLC 2024

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