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Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) and anxiety often overlap, which is why so many kids get misdiagnosed—or missed entirely—and parents are left feeling frustrated and stuck.
Meet Ellie: A Story of Confusing Behaviors and Missed Signs
9 year-old Ellie was always described as “sensitive” and “spirited.” By the time she hit fifth grade, her parents were getting weekly notes about her daydreaming in class, fidgeting constantly, or shutting down altogether when asked to participate.
Her teachers suspected ADHD. But at home, her mom saw something different: Ellie would panic the night before school, cling to her at drop-off, and ruminate over the tiniest social mishaps. Was it ADHD? Anxiety? Or both?
What is Anxiety?
Anxiety isn’t just worry—it’s when the brain gets stuck in fear mode and can’t shut down. While mild anxiety is a normal part of life, clinical anxiety goes deeper.
| Mild Anxiety | Clinical Anxiety |
|---|---|
| Happens before events like tests or performances | Persists long after the event has passed |
| Short-lived and temporary | Ongoing and difficult to shake |
| Fades once the event is over | Child may keep replaying the event in their mind |
| Doesn’t disrupt daily life | Interferes with sleep, focus, and daily functioning |
| Normal, expected reaction | May signal a deeper mental health concern |
Kids in this state aren’t being difficult—they’re overwhelmed. Their nervous system is locked in fight, flight, or freeze, and what looks like defiance is really a dysregulated brain calling for help.
Common anxiety triggers include:
- Loud sounds, itchy tags, bright lights—sensory overload
- Emotional pressure from family dynamics or internal expectations
- Transitions, unpredictability, or sudden changes
- Social struggles or fear of being judged
- Academic demands that feel impossible to meet
Ellie’s Triggers Weren’t Always Obvious
For Ellie, the triggers added up fast—scratchy uniforms, loud fire drills, sudden schedule changes. She hated surprises and constantly asked, “What time are we leaving?” or “Are you sure you’ll pick me up right after?”
Her parents thought she was just high-strung. But what they didn’t realize was that Ellie’s brain wasn’t just overthinking—it was locked in survival mode
These stressors might seem minor on their own, but they pile up. One by one, like bricks—and eventually, the weight is just too much.
Teens are especially at risk as they face:
- Hormonal shifts
- Peer pressure
- More responsibilities
- Fear of failure
Left unchecked, chronic anxiety doesn’t just affect mental health—it can wear down the body too. But when we calm the brain first, everything else can begin to shift.
You’re not alone, and your child isn’t broken—we just need to get their nervous system back on track.
Calm the brain first, everything follows. That’s where real healing begins.
What is ADHD?
ADHD is a brain-based condition that affects a child’s ability to:
- Focus and pay attention
- Control impulses
- Stay organized and follow through
A clinical diagnosis includes consistent patterns of:
- Inattention
- Hyperactivity
- Impulsivity
But here’s the thing—it’s not always that straightforward. Trouble focusing can also be caused by:
- Anxiety
- Chronic stress
- Learning disorders
When the brain is stuck in fear mode, kids can’t access the areas responsible for focus or decision-making. It’s not defiance—it’s dysregulation.
And some teens get really good at masking their anxiety, which means:
- Parents might miss the signs
- ADHD gets misdiagnosed or overlooked
- Kids keep struggling without the right support
Early identification matters. Once we understand what’s going on in the brain, we can create a plan to calm it—so kids can thrive, not just get by.
What looks like behavior is really brain dysregulation.
What is the relationship between Anxiety and ADHD?
ADHD and anxiety often show up together. In fact, data from the CDC (2024) shows ~40% of U.S. children with ADHD also have anxiety. And when they do, symptoms can overlap, intensify, or get missed entirely.
Here’s what parents need to know:
- They often appear together due to shared risk factors like genetics and chronic stress (Michelini et al., 2014).
- Anxiety makes focus harder—a brain stuck in fear mode can’t stay calm or on task.
- In some kids, anxiety may slow impulsivity (Maric et al., 2018)—but that’s not typical.
- For most, it makes ADHD more overwhelming, disrupting sleep, learning, and emotional control.
- Anxiety has been recorded to help inhibition in ADHD children (Panvino et al., 2025)
- ADHD struggles can create anxiety—repeated failures, rejection, or social stress chip away at confidence.
- The best support calms the brain first and builds emotional and social skills along the way.
What looks like behavior is often brain dysregulation.
When Ellie’s Symptoms Collided
By the time she turned 11, Ellie’s meltdowns became more intense. If she didn’t get everything just right, she’d spiral—sobbing, shouting, or shutting down completely.
How are Anxiety and ADHD the Same?
Anxiety and ADHD are different conditions, but they often look similar—especially in kids. Both impact attention, behavior, and emotional regulation, which can lead to confusion, misdiagnosis, or missed support.
Here’s how symptoms can overlap:
1. Social Struggles
- Kids with anxiety fear rejection or being judged
- Kids with ADHD miss social cues or act impulsively
- Both may avoid friendships or stick to a small, familiar circle
2. Avoidance of Group Settings
- Group sports or social events feel overwhelming
- They may worry for days or back out last minute to avoid discomfort
3. Difficulty Focusing
- Anxiety keeps the brain spinning with “what ifs”
- ADHD causes distraction and short attention spans
- Both struggle to concentrate or stay on task
4. Trouble Finishing Tasks
- Anxious kids may freeze or overthink
- ADHD kids often forget or get off track
- Tasks go unfinished or turned in late
5. Low Self-Esteem
- Constant redirection makes them feel “not good enough”
- They may be seen as lazy when they’re actually dysregulated
How are Anxiety and ADHD Different?
At first glance, ADHD and anxiety can look a lot alike. You see a child who’s restless, distracted, maybe even avoidant—and you wonder, “Is this ADHD? Or something deeper?”
The truth? While these two often cross paths, they come from very different places in the brain.
ADHD and anxiety impact the brain differently, especially when it comes to how kids manage their thoughts and actions.
For example:
A recent 2024 study looked at kids around age 10 and found something important—when their brains were asked to juggle a lot of information (that’s what we call working memory), kids with ADHD struggled more with self-control than kids who only had anxiety (Kofler et al., 2024).
Knowing the difference helps you get your child the right kind of support—not just quick fixes or labels.
| Category | ADHD | Anxiety |
|---|---|---|
| Age of Onset | Usually begins in early childhood | Can develop at any age, often around age six or later |
| Physical Symptoms |
|
|
| Focus & Concentration | Struggles to focus on boring tasks but may hyperfocus on preferred ones | Focus gets hijacked by worry |
If you’re staring at your child and wondering, “Why can’t they just focus or calm down?”—know this: it’s not a character flaw. It’s brain dysregulation. That’s why getting a clear, compassionate evaluation is so important.
Decode the behavior. Regulate the brain. Calm the chaos.
How to Help Children and Teens with Anxiety and ADHD
With professional support, Ellie was diagnosed with anxiety and executive functioning delays—not full ADHD. Her family began neurofeedback and CBT to help calm her brain, not change who she was.
They added breathwork, movement, and structure at home—little shifts that made a big difference.
Today, Ellie still has tough moments, but she knows how to manage them. Her parents no longer feel lost—they have a roadmap and a more connected, regulated child.
When ADHD and anxiety overlap, kids feel overwhelmed—and parents often feel stuck. But with the right tools, you can help your child build focus, confidence, and emotional regulation.
Here are five brain-based strategies that make a big difference:
1. Teach your kids to do breathwork and meditation
When your child’s brain is stuck in “go-go-go” mode, teaching them how to pause and breathe can be game-changing. Here’s the thing: it doesn’t need to be fancy—just a few slow belly breaths can shift everything.
These calming tools help your child:
- Settle their racing thoughts
- Regulate an overstimulated nervous system
- Dial down that inner critic
- Recenter their focus
- Reconnect with the present
Try it together after school or before bed. Even 3 minutes can reset their whole day.
2. Get them to exercise regularly
Movement is medicine for the brain—especially for kids who run anxious. Whether it’s jumping on a trampoline, dancing to music, or walking the dog, getting their body moving helps their mind slow down.
Regular exercise can:
- Burn off extra energy and stress
- Boost mood naturally
- Improve sleep and attention (Sun et al., 2022)
- Strengthen mind-body connection
3. Encourage your child to socialize
Kids with anxiety or ADHD may:
- Avoid social situations due to fear or impulsivity
- Struggle to pick up on social cues
- Feel rejected or misunderstood
Here’s how to build their confidence:
- Role-play social scenarios at home
- Encourage brief, low-pressure hangouts
- Celebrate tiny wins (like waving or saying hi)
Progress looks different for every child. What matters is showing them they’re safe—and seen.
4. Identify their triggers
Help your child become aware of common triggers like:
- Loud noises or sensory overload
- Transitions or unpredictability
- Fear of making mistakes or being judged
Then give them go-to strategies such as:
- Breathing techniques
- Movement breaks
- Asking for help calmly
5. Divide big tasks into several small tasks
Overwhelm can lead to shutdown, so:
- Divide assignments into 20–30 minute chunks
- Use visual checklists or timers
- Offer praise after each step to build momentum
These small shifts create safety in your child’s nervous system—and that’s when real growth begins.
Parent Action Steps
FAQs
Can anxiety be mistaken as ADHD?
Yes, absolutely. Anxiety can mimic ADHD symptoms like inattention, restlessness, and difficulty focusing. A child stuck in worry mode might appear distracted or avoidant, which is why it’s so important to look deeper. What seems like behavior may actually be a dysregulated nervous system.
Should you treat anxiety or ADHD first?
We always start by calming the brain—because once the nervous system is regulated, everything else gets easier. For many kids, treating anxiety helps improve ADHD symptoms too. A personalized approach guided by a professional is key.
Will my child grow out of ADHD or anxiety?
While some kids may outgrow certain challenges, most need support to build regulation skills. With the right interventions, they can thrive—not just “cope.” Early, brain-based support creates lasting change.
Citations
[CDC] Center for Disease Control. Data and Statistics on ADHD. Retrieved from https://www.cdc.gov/adhd/data/index.html.
Kofler, M., Groves, N., Chan, E., Marsh, C., Cole, A., Gaye, F., Cibrian, E., Tatsuki, M., and Singh, L. (2024). Working memory and inhibitory control deficits in children with ADHD: an experimental evaluation of competing model predictions. Front. Psychiatry (15). https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyt.2024.1277583.
Maric, M., Bexkens, A., & Bögels, S. M. (2018). Is Clinical Anxiety a Risk or a Protective Factor for Executive Functioning in Youth with ADHD? A Meta-regression Analysis. Clinical Child and Family Psychology Review, 21(3), 340–353. https://doi.org/10.1007/s10567-018-0255-8
Michelini, G., Eley, T. C., Gregory, A. M., & McAdams, T. A. (2014). Aetiological overlap between anxiety and attention deficit hyperactivity symptom dimensions in adolescence. Journal of Child Psychology and Psychiatry, 56(4), 423–431. https://doi.org/10.1111/jcpp.12318
Panvino, F., Zaccaria, V., Pica, M., Amitrano, N., Pisani, F., and Brina, C. (2025). ADHD children take more time to inhibit automatic responses: a comparison with anxiety disorders using NEPSY-II. Children 12(6):798. https://doi.org/10.3390/children12060798.
Sun, W., Yu, M., & Zhou, X. (2022). Effects of physical exercise on attention deficit and other major symptoms in children with ADHD: A meta-analysis. Psychiatry Research, 311, 114509. https://doi.org/10.1016/j.psychres.2022.114509
Always remember… “Calm Brain, Happy Family™”
Disclaimer: This article is not intended to give health advice and it is recommended to consult with a physician before beginning any new wellness regime. *The effectiveness of diagnosis and treatment varies by patient and condition. Dr. Roseann Capanna-Hodge, LLC does not guarantee certain results.
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